Example 2

Before

Back to top

Dear [name]

Thank you for your email received today.

I am sorry that you have cause to raise concerns about the Nursing and Midwifery Council with regards to [insert summary of complaint here].

Your complaint will be investigated under stage two of our corporate complaints process: http://www.nmc.org.uk/contactus/complaints-about-us/.

Under this process you can expect to receive a response within 20 working days from receipt, which will be no later than [insert date here].

In the unlikely event that there is a delay in you receiving your response we will notify you by email.

If you have any query about this and would like to speak to me, my direct line is [insert Complaint Officer’s telephone number].

Yours sincerely

[name]

After

Back to top

Dear [name]

Thank you for your email. I’m sorry to hear about [summary of complaint].

We’ll investigate this under stage two of our complaints process (the formal complaint stage). We’ll respond by [date]. If there’s any delay (which is unlikely), we’ll let you know by email.

Thank you again for getting in touch. If you have any questions, please do give me a call on [number].

Thanks,

[name]

What’s changed?

Back to top

• ‘I am sorry that you have cause to raise concerns’ sounds like a non-apology. Instead, we’ve said ‘I’m sorry to hear about…’ – it sounds kinder.
• We’ve swapped the passive ‘your complaint will be investigated’ for the active ‘We’ll investigate your complaint’.
• We’ve made the sentences shorter too. For example, instead of ‘Under this process you can expect to receive a response within 20 working days from receipt, which will be no later than [insert date here]’, we’ve simply said, ‘We’ll respond by [date]’.
• We’ve taken out unnecessarily formal language, like ‘your email received today’ and ‘we will notify you’.
• And we’ve added a friendly message at the end by thanking them again for getting in touch.